Thursday, December 20, 2012

The following is an open letter to the MRM from Chris Key. Chris was recently disavowed by A Voice for in a blog post written by Paul Elam (The Happy Misogynist). I thought that what Paul was doing was unfair, counter productive, and frankly anathema to what the Men's Movement is about.

Discarding an MRA because his views were too extreme or his delivery too unpolished is not what MRA's should be doing. Male disposability is what we are supposed to be working against rather than promoting to achieve our own ends.

Dear MRM,

Over the last 14 hours I have done a lot of soul searching. I've come to the conclusion that it's in the best interest of both parties if I leave the MRM. I don't want it to be a hostile departure because nothing can be gained from an event that ends on a negative note. I leave with no ill feelings towards you or anyone else.

Before I go, I would like to explain my stance on homosexuality, why I act differently to the people on AVfM, why I hurled so much vitriol at Suz -- and why I owe her an apology -- and why I need to leave the MRM, permanently, so that I can heal the health problems that trouble me everyday.

I want to apologise to Suz, but for me to do that, I need to explain my stance on homosexuality. It's crucial because it will help you understand what was going through my mind when I responded to her.

My Stance Against Homosexuality

The militant stance I hold against homosexuality began in 2011. I came across credible exposes on some of the ideologies that have been promoted by many mainstream homosexual rights group and, conduct that was performed in the public domain by a large number of homosexuals. I'm not talking about understandable ideologies such as "equal rights for homosexuals". I'm talking about large, well funded homosexual groups advocating that it's okay for homosexuals to have sex with minors.

Organisations such as Gay Lesbian Adolescent Social Services (GLASS) were placed in charge of looking after children, but went on to use their position to have sex with vulnerable minors: the U.N. was caught endorsing some of the pro-paedophile homosexuals groups after it became aware of their behaviour during the 1990s.

Up until that point I didn't know anything about these things, so I was shocked to learn that a considerably large segement of the homosexual movement were not only involved in carrying out such acts, but were supported by people who are meant to be looking out for the best interests of children. Not only was I shocked, but I was absolutely furious. I've always believed that children are to be nurtured. There's no way I can support people who are going out of their way to harm children.

If all of this wasn't enough reason for me to believe the homosexual rights movement was a rampant paedophile machine that does not care about children's rights, then the way the American media and politicians treated the murders of Matthew Shepard and Jesse Dirkhising confirmed that there was a sinister agenda at play and, that the agenda needed to be opposed. For those who do not know, Jesse Dirkhising was a 13-year-old boy who was brutally raped and murdered by two homosexual men. His death came about a year after Matthew Shepard was killed. When Shepard was killed it was assumed that the motivation behind the crime was homophobia. The truth, which was stated by the prosecutor who tried Shepard's murderers, and, confirmed by details that were released by the police, is that Shepard was killed in a drug deal that went sour. This didn't stop homosexual rights groups from saying the motive was homophobia. Till this very day, politicians and mainstream media continue to overlook the evidence and pretend it was about homophobia. When a politician does admit that it was a drug deal that went sour then they are vilified extremely by the mainstream media.

It really upsets that all of this injustice has been allowed to take place. Maybe I've interpreted it the wrong way, but it appears to me as if those who are in power (politicians, mainstream media) believe that the rights of homosexual paedophiles are more important than children's right to not be abused and, that appeasing the homosexual community is more important than fair, objective treatment.

In response, I believed that the homosexual rights movement is the most dangerous threat to society, as they played a key role in spreading anti-straight propaganda to strum up hysteria for homosexual rights and, they were complicit in allowing child abuse to occur. It didn't seem to worry the people from those groups that their actions were unjust and caused immense suffering for Jesse Dirkhising's family.

Based on that, I came to the conclusion that all homosexuals are a threat to society, because, I didn't see very many good, law-abiding homosexuals opposing those who are guilty of this injustice. I know that's extreme, but that's how I think. Since the homosexual community could not be counted on to stop the injustice, I formed the opinion that the only way to solve the problem is to oppoose the entire homosexual community. I don't want to see children hurt. I want those who are a threat to children to be disarmed by the government as soon as possible. The only way I could see that happening is if enough people stand up and oppose all homosexual rights. I know that's extreme, but I find it hard to sympathise with people who take rights away from children.

My anger has intensified since I learned that Canadian schools are teaching young children that living in a household that consists of the nuclear family unit is "toxic". I automatically assumed all MRAs would be disgusted by this because one of the main tenets of the MRM is that children need a mother and a father. I saw it as another attack on father's rights and, assumed there might be a link between the homosexual movement and feminism; a considerable amount of second-wave feminists were homosexual women.

If that makes me narrow-minded, hysterical and hateful, then so be it, but it's the only stance that sat well with me; I couldn't think of a solution that would be as effective at protecting children.

Do you now understand why I distrust homosexuals and am absolutely livid with them?

I'm not saying all homosexuals are intent on harming children. Nor am I saying it's justifiable to hate all homosexuals for the actions of its leaders. What I'm saying is the fact that the people in charge of representing homosexual rights have been found guilty of harming children makes me sick in the stomach, and, it angers me that so few homosexuals oppose them.

Usage of Terms Like "Fags and Dykes"

I've been referring to homosexuals as "fags" and "dykes" because I believe the terms "gay" and "lesbian" have been hijacked by the homosexual movement. I know that sounds strange, but hear me out. A few years ago I recall reading an article, posted on my forum by one of its members, that the people of Lesbos were angry about homosexual women referring to them as lesbians. I thought that their feelings ought to given just as much consideration as those of homosexuals. If I were to say that the people of Lesbos should just get over it then I would be supporting the same system that tells us that white men cannot be victimised because they're female and aren't ethnic. As an MRA, I cannot support any system that has harmed men.

The Honourable Bob Katter left a mark on me when he said in Canberra, during a meeting about protecting the institution of marriage, that "gay" was a beautiful word that conjured up images of happiness and love. He went on to say that he used it in a school project when he was a kid, then said that the homosexual community have no right to change the meaning of that word. His speech reminded me of the lawsuit that the people of Lesbos filed to stop homosexual women from being called 'lesbians'. I have a lot of respect for Bob Katter as a he's a conservative manly man who isn't afraid to speak up to feminists and other leftist groups. He is bullied regularly by leftists, homosexuals and city folk, which really upsets me. I thought he had a point, so I decided that from that point onwards I would no longer refer to homosexuals as "gays and lesbians". I was also very, very angry with the entire homosexual community for the reasons stated above, so I decided it was fair to refer to them as "fags and dykes". I know that two wrongs do not usually make a right, but I felt that his was a situation where it what's needed. I must admit that I still feel that way because I cannot think of an alternative solution.

Now that you know why I am so angry with homosexuals, I can move on to explaining why I owe Suz an apology for the manner I spoke to her.

Via a comment left on AVfM, I stumbled upon an article on Suz's site. It was a letter she addressed to a homosexual. In the comments section of her letter I saw a couple of women calling him a "loser". I was silly enough to assume that they used that term because they disliked homosexuals as much as I do. As a result, I wrote a very disparaging post about homosexuals, mentioning the Jesse Dirkhising and Mathew Shepard cases, the high HIV and Hepatitis A rates among homosexuals, and, the low life expectancy of homosexuals. Some of the things I said about homosexuals were inhumane and should not have been said about anyone. After that I wrote a second post, citing the sources of my information.

Suz deleted both posts, saying she does not condone bigotry.

I could understand Suz removing the first post but I couldn't understand the link between the second post and her charge of bigotry. I assumed she was saying it's wrong to cite credible sources that show not everything homosexuals do is healthy and, that there might be a link between the homosexual lifestyle and poor health (I've heard a lot of liberals use this to argue that people should pretend that homosexuals are not more likely to contract HIV, Hepatitis A, or have an average lifespan that is about 20 years shorter than that for straight people).

Remember, I've come across a lot of credible evidence that shows there's a conspiracy to support homosexuals who abuse children. Due to this, I automatically assumed that if a person blindly rejects it then they're in on the conspiracy and are trying to promote it. That's why I referred to Suz as a 'fag enabler' and spoke so harshly towards her.

I would like to take this opportunity to publicly apologise to Suz. She did not deserve to be spoken to like that. I was wrong and I'm ashamed of myself for letting my emotion get the better of me. I don't expect Suz to forgive me, but I hope this confession will allow her to understand where I was coming from and why I responded like I did; more importantly, it'll show her that I take full responsibility for my behaviour.

Why I Must Depart the MRM

My biggest problem is I don't really understand people all that well. When I don't understand something I compensate by jumping to assumptions. It's a bad habit that I've gotten myself into over the years, and it, it gets me into trouble every now and then. It's why I believe I must depart the MRM. In today's politically correct landscape it's important to understand the basics of social interaction. Since my people skills are so poor, I'm a massive disadvantage when it comes to getting my points across. The last thing the MRM needs is some one who has this problem.

You guys don't know me, but I've been involved in the MRM for about a decade. There used to be a secret board for MRAs, called Our Board. It was run by Zed/Zenpriest, who is one of the admins at The Spearhead. Only those who were invited were allowed to post on it. I was invited there by Darren Blacksmith in 2003/2004. I helped design the MGTOW logo, which was created by Rangar. He created the movement as well as the logo, but I edited out the pixelation and made an emoticon for it; if I recall correctly, he saved it as a low quality JPEG file, so I edited it and converted it to PNG and GIF.

I started my site in late 2004. I've spent an average of 3 or so hours on my site each day over that period. It's been a huge part of my life. Living without it will be difficult, but it's for the best. It's been a rock for me as it's allowed to develop friendships with people I now consider family. I have trouble socialising, so it has helped me out. I'm extremely grateful to the guys on my forum who've been loyal to me over the years. I'll forever be grateful to the wonderful people who've been loyal to my forum: people like outcoors, DCM, Malthus, bobx23456, ChristinaAF, Serpent Slayer, Gears, Zuberi, Yeuu and Feminist Scum. There have been times when I felt like shutting the site down due to the amount of new members drying up about 2 years ago, but I've carried on with it because I don't want to let down my mates. I might keep the forum going as a private forum for all of the regular posters over the next few months, but I do not know if I'll be posting too much. At some stage between now and October next year -- the date when my webplan expires -- I'll either shut it down or give it to one of the members.

I'm not cut out to be a leader. It's why my forum has not grown larger and why I don't the tough calls that need to be made. There were times when I tried to be strict and keep the discussion very moderate and polite -- as is evidenced by Robin Steele applauding me on her blog in 2007 -- but I couldn't keep it up because the pressure it created was just too much. I have difficulty saying no, so I more or less let the board be as uncensored as possible. I allowed people to say things that I did not agree with. Over time I just ignored it because I've grown to care more about my mates than I do about pleasing third-party viewers. It's for this reason the board has to be shut off to the outside world and shut down.

My Health Condition

As Keyster already knows -- he was a regular poster on my board for a few years -- I live with a debilitating illness that makes it impossible to work and difficult to socialise. I'm not asking for sympathy, just want to clarify what it's like to spend a day in my shoes. That way you will be better equipped to understand how and why I think the way I do, and, how it affects me on a day-to-day basis. I don't have many friends because socialising regularly makes my condition worse. As a result, the MRM and my website have been the one place I've been able to turn to for help, which isn't always in the best interest of the movement. It has helped me to some extent, but it has become harmful to me over the last couple of years. My condition is worsening, and the only way I can deal with it is by permanently removing myself from the MRM. I don't want to go -- it breaks my heart to leave something that I've been a part of for almost a decade -- but it's what I need to do if I am going to heal. The stress of being involved in the MRM is too much for my OCD (I have a very severe case of OCD, and, it does not respond very well to CBT).

Contary to what Keyster said, I've never celebrated 6th of December as "Saint Marc's Day". The only member on my board who has supported it is bobx23456. I've told him on many times that I do not condone what Marc Lepine did on the 6th of December 1989. I've always said he had no right to kill innocent civilian women.

The MRM has helped me learn a lot about life, but it also gets in the way of my illness. I can now use that knowledge to help me live with my condition.

I'll remove the posts on my blog ( about Suz, as well as anything else that uses the terms "fags" and "dykes".

Addressed to Paul Elam

Paul, I may not agree with everything you say and do, but I respect you because you've raised a lot of awareness for men's rights and are a very hard worker.

Believe it or not, you have had an influence on my life. There was a time when you told me, on my forum in 2009, that I should not censor my members. I followed your advice. The board was heavily moderated, in 2007, by myself and a woman called elfprincess. I copped a lot of criticism during that period -- some of it justified as it turned out she was sort of a feminist -- so when you suggested I do not censor free speech, I listened.  I was heading in that direction anyway, but your suggestion convinced me to let free speech reign supreme. I didn't want a repeat of what happened in 2007.

I swear I do not recall ever saying to you that I hate women. If I did say that then it would have been to make you feel that I wasn't judging you -- you know, with you using the name TheHappyMisogynist and having a website by that name. But alas, I do not recall saying it, so I'll deny it until the day I die.

It's impossible for me to hate women when my best friend (my mum) is a woman. My mother and I are very close -- we're closer than she is to her daughters -- we spend everyday with one another and help each other out. My mother and I have the same debilitating illness, so we understand one another very well. I took offence to you referring to me as a "son of a bitch", because, you were effectively calling my mother a bitch.

I'd appreciate it if you removed the article you made about me. It might be better to replace it with this one, or nothing at all. It's better for the MRM if everyone in it is cohesive and on the same page. Taking down your article and replacing it with this one will show the world that even when things don't work out between the MRM and one of its members, the MRM can still gell together and find a solution that is in everyone's best interest. I'll remove the article I wrote about you if you remove the one you wrote about me.

I do not want to be a burden to the movement. It was never my intention to bring negative attention to the movement. However, since I have inadvertently done this, the only decent thing left to do is for me to leave the movement so that experts, such as yourself, can continue fighting for the rights of men, women and children.

I do not hold any ill feelings towards you. I was critical of you yesterday and the day before, but only because I was angry and upset. I leave in peace and hope you live a long and prosperous life.

I hope you accept my offer for peace.

Thank you.

Chris Key.

I wish Chris the best. While I think his departure is unwarranted I hope he uses this time to find peace and meaning in his life in other areas. That, after all, is what MGTOW is all about.